Injury, Nerve Pain and Learning to Check My Ego

My neck isn’t great.

I recently saw a Facebook memory from 2009 (massive cringe by the way) complaining that I had hurt my neck and couldn’t move, pulling “something” after picking up a puppy. Bouts of this would come and go, never lasting for more than a few days. This is normal.. right?

While I was still at boot camp in 2016 I started to experience what felt like fatigue in my left arm.

Down my arm, into the elbow and across the top of my forearm. I ignored this for a while. Until I couldn’t and went to a physio who to their credit directed me to my GP for a referral to have a CT on my neck.

C5/C6 mild to moderate broad based disc bulge.

C6/C7 moderate left posterior disc bulge. The disc is indenting the left anterior part of the thecal sac. There is a likely encroachment on the left C6 and C7 nerve root.

Tops.

I was given exercises, slow-release anti inflammatories and told to limit overhead exercises.

I continued to go to the gym but felt useless and deflated as I scaled and changed movements for every workout. From being enthusiastic and bouncing with excitement now my attitude had changed to “Great, what can’t I do today?”

Knock knock. Who’s there? Ego. Ego who?

I stopped going to the gym and walked my weimaraner twice a day for 3 months and my arm was feeling better, but I was bored.

Matt swapped back to CrossFit and was enjoying it and I was now a “walker”.

By January 2017 I was sure I was cured. I had rested, done the exercises, that’s how this works right? I plucked up the courage and started Crossfit. I explained my arm/neck situation and that I was “managing it.” I assured my coaches I was fine, but I was pushing it hard, and by April 2017 my left hand was so numb I could hardly grip the pull up bar. I would keep trying to shake it out, shake some kind of feeling into it. Shortly after bouts of numbness, flames started shooting down my arm and out my fingertips. You know you are alive when your arm is invisibly on fire. All the time.

Now whatever is the worst pain you have ever experienced is the worst pain YOU have ever experienced. Some people will have the fortune of their worst pain being a stubbed toe and if you are one of those people, you my friend are blessed. Nerve pain is different. If you have ever experienced bad nerve pain, there is no way to describe it.

After eating Panadeine Forte like tic tacs I was eventually put on Lyrica which works great for nerve pain but unfortunately feels like I’m six beers deep, slow, with brain fog. I would take it once I got to work because I couldn’t drive on it, but it worked, and it stopped me from going insane and committing murder. Lyrica, for me, however, could not be a long-term solution.

Cortisone injections were suggested to me, and I was willing to give anything a shot (no pun intended). I was given two injections C5/C6 and C6/C7 although most of my symptoms were linked to the C6/C7 encroachment. Cortisone changed the game for me and within a week, or so, I was pain free. I understand they aren’t as successful in every case, but for me – they were magic, and my first lot of injections lasted over twelve months.

After twelve months I do get flare ups. It’s a bit of a borrowed time scenario. I know how it feels when they are coming on, starts with elbow pain then down the back of the arm and then numbness in the hand but I try not to let it get to the flames stage and book myself in for another jab with time to spare.

How does my training affect my neck? I get asked this mostly by people that do not go to the gym and the answer is – it helps. Each scan of my neck shows improvement. What started off a moderate and a mild to moderate bulge is now one mild bulge C6/C7. Exercise has strengthened my neck and surrounding muscles supporting my spine. What’s that saying? “Being weak is more dangerous than getting strong.”

How does my neck affect my training? A bit. I am slow as all heck with hand stand push ups, slowing lowering my head to the ground, trying to protect my neck. I also spend extra time warming up my shoulders either with a broom stick, bands, or a few minutes on the ski erg when we do high rep overhead work. I find keeping the area rolled or gunned helpful also.

One of my biggest hurdles is still my ego. Managing an injury for an extended period is frustrating and can be extremely humbling, I am getting better at it, but I still have my moments. I am still learning its ok scale something I am usually proficient in and enjoy or can taking a day off and rest if that’s what my body needs (which is harder than it sounds).

I also practice gratitude. I am one of the lucky ones. I am unmedicated. I am non-surgical, and I am not in chronic pain.

And that’s not too bad for an old bird with a bad neck.

-Ann